Plain Quaker Dressing at FGC
Comments (6)
As we got onto the campus of UMass Amherst to help set up for this year’s FGC Gathering, Julie & I realized that this is the first time we’ve been to this venue since we started plain dressing (last year we stayed home since Julie was very pregnant). FGC Friends tend to turn to the Lands End catalog for sartorial inspiration. Hippie culture is another font, both directly as tie-die shirts and in muted form as the tasteful fair-trade clothes that many older Friends prefer. Because the Gathering takes place in July and in sporadically air-conditioned buildings, people also dress for summer camp—khaki shorts & once colorful faded t-shirts are the de facto Gathering uniform. In this setting, just wearing long pants is cause for comment (“aren’t you hot like that?!”) Try broadfalls and a long-sleeve collarless shirt, or a long dress!
So I’ve decided to write down all the conversations or questions I get about my dress this week. I should mention that I actually prefer curious questions to the strange staring I sometimes get. So here we go:
- While ringing up a Gathering store order: someone I’ve known for years asked me whether my clothing was “a theological statement or if it was just comfortable.”
- While troubleshooting the store computers and answering a cellphone call from the office: compared to a literary character named “Cosmic Possum,” who was described to me as someone able to seemlessly live in both the past and modern world (at the time the reference was made I was working two computers and taking a cell phone call.
- Walking by the dining hall, an older Friend called out “Looks good!” I said “Huh?”, he replied “that’s a good outfit!”
Monday:
- “Nice outfit” again, this time from Nils P. As soon as he said it I warned him that I was keeping this log and that he should expect to see himself in it.
- I talked a little bit about dress with a friend from Baltimore Yearly Meeting, a gay Friend involved with FLGCQBC who is identifying more and more as conservative and thinking about going plain. One concern he raised was avoiding sweatshop labor. (I pointed out that plain dress is a cottage industry and that the seamstresses are usually local and believers.) He also doesn’t want to look “like a farmer” as he walks around the city of Baltimore. (I talked about how I have limits as to how plain I go and don’t want this to be a historical outfit but one which people might actually be able to see themselves adopting. I also talked about how I still want to identify on some level with urban anarchist culture, which has a sort of plain aesthetic.)
Tuesday:
- An extended conversation with a bookstore customer from California. She began by asking if I’m doing plain dress for the same reasons as another plain dresser here, who I’ve seen but not met yet. We began talking about motivations and what it’s like and how it is for women, especially who lead active lives. I talked about my wife’s Julie’s practice, which includes leotards when she’s working at a gymnastics coach. We also talked about different kinds of QuakersIt was a great conversation.
- While sitting on a bookstore couch blogging: “You’re looking very distinguished here, with facial hair and susspenders. Is this what married life does? You’re looking very Quakerly. Does thee also have a hat?”
Wednesday I spent sick mostly in bed…
- I did have a brief, fever-fed conversation with some of the other plain dressing youths and soon-to-be plain dressing youth. It’s not about dress, but about being Quaker and about how we live as Friends.
Thursday:
- I had an extended conversation with a couple who run the Equal Exchange table about plain dress, Gohn Brothers catalog and avoiding sweatshop-made clothing for union-made clothing. There’s a lot of people interested in this and the issues really connect with simplicity and justice issues.
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Martin,
You forgot to mention that on Friday, you received valuable pointers from a plain dressing young adult on how to easily remove that excessive collar from your shirt. ;)
It was good meeting you this week, and I'll keep you posted on how these young adult ministry dialogues in FGC continue to develop from my perspective. I'll also be exploring a number of listening sessions regarding the role of young adults in my monthly meeting.
Hi Jeffrey,
Oh yes, let me not forget the useful lessons learned from the young adults. We should all listen to the children, for there is much to learn from their wisdom. (This is the first Gathering I've gone to where I haven't been involved in the young adult program).
Yes, that was a helpful lesson in do-it-yourself collar removal. I didn't realize it was quite so easy. I'll try it out a few times and might just write it up and put it online.
It was good meeting you too, I'm sure it's the start of a long friendship.
I'll write up more about the Gathering, but over the next week I'll have to unpack the books, answer dozens of bookstore emails, and figure out all the order snafus from the past ten days. After each day of this I'll go home to pack, as Julie Theo and I actually are moving by month's end. It'll be a busy busy few weeks but I'll find some time (train time maybe?) to keep the blog up.
Martin,
Thanks for this blog! I wish you were in Minneapolis because it sounds like your family and mine have lots in common. I'd love to visit with you guys over our kitchen table.
Anyway. How did you guys test your leading for dressing plain? What kind of research did you do? How did the leading become apparent to you at first? I'd love to hear about your process because I've been getting a few nudges about this myself.
Thanks!
Elizabeth O'Sullivan
Minneapolis, MN
Elizabeth O'Sullivan
Just read, My Experiments with Plainness and Plain Quaker Dressing at FGC. I have Friends/friends that dress plain (they are the only family in our meeting that dress plain) and I have been trying it out off and on. I bought an Amish cap resently and I wore it to meeting. After meeting (and when I was relatively alone in the room) an elder Friend came up to me (I was seated) and struck a blow to my hat and, thus, my head with her hand. This from a woman who stands on the corner of our city, near the federal building, every week to stand up for peace and non-violence and teaches workshops on non-violent conflict resolution. I guess if it's personal it's OK to use violence!!?? I guess you can tell that I am still upset about it. I really appreciate being able to read your contributions from your experiences. And thanks for listening to my frustrations.
Peace and Blessings,
Dixie Rosendall
Grand Rapids, MI
Hi Dixie,
Ouch!, what a disturbing incident. Am I surprised? Well, not really. A lot of Friends find plain dressing threatening. I've found this especially true of some of Peace Quakers, who don't want to think about theology and really don't want to talk about tests of discernment that might question the motivation of their activism. Even though you weren't questioning this elder, your dress implied that maybe there is something more to Quakerism than holding a sign at the federal building. I suspect there's a lot of generational stuff going too.
Your story reminds me of my own and of the reasons I haven't stepped foot in my Meetinghouse for over a year now. Telling stories isn't helpful though. As I understand it, proper Gospel Order dictates that you should tell this Friend that it wasn't acceptable behavior (you can bring along someone to be there with you) and then talk to the overseers in your Meeting if the problems persists.
Honestly: I can't say you'll feel any better and you might be in for a rude awakening at just how thoroughly your Meeting runs from conflict and from doing the right thing ("speaking truth to power" shouldn't just be a slogan Friends reserve for the federal government). In times like these I find consolation from the old journals of Quaker ministers: every one who's ever done anything interesting has suffered through the opposition of their fellow Quakers. May the Christ hold you in comfort through this frustrating and demoralizing time.
Now you have me wondering about those collar-removal tips. Ready to share yet? ;)